


Hurricanes in Your Heart

by zenzenzence



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Domestic Violence, Established Relationship, F/F, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Lesbian Pacifica Northwest, Minor Jesus "Soos" Alzamirano Ramirez/Melody, Pansexual Mabel Pines, Post-Weirdmageddon, References to Depression, Slurs, Trans Dipper Pines, background fiddlestan, mabifica
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-04-18
Packaged: 2018-06-03 00:00:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6588637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zenzenzence/pseuds/zenzenzence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>READ THE TAGS.</p><p>...</p><p>Her mother waved Pacifica’s top of the line smartphone in her hand as she yelled, switching back between sneering at the special photos and at the private messages that together held the fourteen-year-old’s greatest secrets. Her mother’s words infuriated her, but they terrified her more.</p><p>...</p><p>Two years after Weirdmaggeddon, Pacifica is unwillingly outed to her parents. They aren't happy.</p><p>...</p><p>***WILL LIKELY REMAIN A ONE-SHOT UNLESS INSPIRATION HITS</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hurricanes in Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

> WARNINGS FOR CHILD ABUSE AND HOMOPHOBIA AND DEPRESSION!!
> 
> I wrote this because the fandom needs more mabifica fics that are actually about mabifica and that do NOT include billdip.
> 
> Inspired by my parents being very anti-LGBTQ+
> 
> I'll happily add more to this if requested. This is unedited. I really struggled coming up with a title for this...
> 
> In case it is unclear, the Northwests moved into Soos's old house in this story.
> 
> Please go ahead and share your thoughts! Constructive criticism is appreciated.

* * *

The slap was loud and fast, hot and sharp, and not entirely unexpected.

 

_“So you’re a lesbo whore now?”_

 

Pacifica’s head was whipped to the side from the impact.

 

_“We did not raise you like this!”_

 

Tears instantly stabbed at her eyes against her will, as they did every time something like this happened behind closed doors.

 

_“Do you have any idea how much more shame, how much more embarrassment, this will bring our family name?”_

 

A red bruise was already in bloom across her cheek, she knew.

 

_“No daughter of mine is going to be a queer!”_

 

Her mother’s eyes bore into hers, reflecting nothing but pure rage, disgust, and hatred.

 

_“You are supposed to like boys.”_

 

Her father had long since exhausted his share of shouting. He merely stood at the edge of the cramped livingroom, expression dark, silent, body hunched in some sort of prayer. It was only her mother, usually so calm and composed and the image of high society perfection, screeching a her now. Pacifica sniffed and willed herself not to cry a single tear. Not this time.

 

_“How long have you been fooling around with this slutty peasant bumpkin?”_

 

Her mother waved Pacifica’s top of the line smartphone in her hand as she yelled, switching back between sneering at the special photos and at the private messages that together held the fourteen-year-old’s greatest secrets. Her mother’s words infuriated her, but they terrified her more.

 

Pacifica watched her father lean his arm on the window, too ashamed of his daughter to even speak or look, gazing blankly out the window.

 

They’d been living in the single story house previously owned by the Ramirezes in the “Poor People’s Ghetto” in the middle of town for nearly two years at that point, and while Pacifica had been able to mature and learn that having money doesn't automatically make her better than anyone, to learn the importance of being kind, her parents still had trouble... _adjusting_ to the middle class lifestyle.

 

_“Answer me!”_

 

Her mother was directly in her face, perfectly manicured nails digging into shoulders, spit leaving snarled lips, eyes aflame. Another slap hit. Pacifica felt more tears spring to her eyes.

 

For the first time since she had been called upon and discovered that her parents had grossly invaded her privacy, she took a deep, shaky breath.

 

_“You need to grow up, Pacifica Elise Northwest! We will not allow this. We didn’t have you so you could hang out with fags and turn into a homo.”_

 

Pacifica closed her eyes and thought of Mabel. The silly, sweet, weird, wonderful, talented, cheerful, insufferable, loving, beautiful girl that she’d been in regular contact with since the end of the Pines twins’ first summer in Gravity Falls two years before. The girl that she’s had a crush on for well over a year. The girl that she’d been dating since the start of summer two and a half months ago. The girl that felt more like home than her parents. The girl whose family didn’t mind Pacifica’s presence.

 

Priscilla shook her daughter wildly, screeching more insults, more demands, more hatred, but Pacifica decided to stop listening. They’d left the bell at the mansion. She wasn’t their puppet. Pacifica shoved against her mother, and the woman stumbled back a step, surprised. Preston hadn’t moved, nor did Pacifica expect him to. She began to make her way out of the room, before turning around and snatching her cell phone from her mother’s hand.

 

Pacifica gazed at her mother for only a moment. Swallowing, she asserted, “I don’t care what you think of me. You can’t . . . You can’t change anything. I’ve—I have always been this way.” Pacifica stormed down the hall as loudly as she could and slammed her bedroom door with enough force to knock a framed million dollar portrait off the wall. Her parents hated that.

 

They didn’t call for her again.

 

* * *

 

Sneaking out her window was easy after she removed the screen and tucked it in the back of her closet, a place she could never truly return to. She angrily rubbed at her eyes with her sweatshirt sleeve and tossed a packed duffle bag to the grass below. After locking her door and flicking off the light, Pacifica successfully climbed through and dropped the short distance into the fenced off yard. Her heart constantly lurched into her throat despite having done this dozens of times before to hang out with Dipper and Mabel and their dysfunctional family that managed to be more functional than her own.

 

Cell phone in hand illuminating the darkness that accompanied summer nights at 10:45, Pacifica began a brisk pace out of the yard, off the property, and down the street, her purple hood secured tightly over her scalp.

 

Pacifica stopped at the end of Chambrot Drive, observing the shadows cast by a street lamp. Almost without warning her emotions burst out of her: tears running down her cheeks, hands cupped over her mouth to contain her wails, shoulders shaking as she attempted to breath.

 

Ever since she stopped submitting to her parents’ every will and expectation, Pacifica has always feared that they would discover her sexuality. She knew it would always turn out like this: rejection, denial, anger, hatred. Her parents were Republicans. They were furious months ago when gay marriage became legal in Oregon. They were homophobic and transphobic and never even attempted to understand bisexuality or asexuality or gender identity. Bitterly, Pacifica mused that her parents would probably be even more furious with her if they discovered that Mabel was pan and Dipper trans. Pacifica felt like she was suffocating.

 

Attempting to laugh only made her sob harder. She was even less safe at home than she was before. She didn’t want to ever go back to that house.

 

After counting down from 300 in increments of 20, Pacifica was able to take deep breaths and postpone her panic attack. She ripped her hood back and tugged at her hair, exhausted, cold, and numb. She knew that soon she was going to more Bad Brain thoughts than normal, and needed to do something, go somewhere probably, before she decided to just lay in the middle of the road and wait for a car to plow into her like roadkill.

 

She wasn’t sure who to call.

 

Stan and Ford both began living in Fiddleford’s mansion after returning from their year-long Anomaly-Busting-Expedition when the con artist began dating the recovered hillbilly. Soos and Melody lived in the Mystery Shack. Dipper and Mabel seemed to switch between these locations at random, so Pacifica had no idea where they were tonight. The blonde couldn’t drive, and she wasn’t up for walking in long distances in the dark. She wasn’t in the mood for a visit to her old residence, and Soos had a truck.

 

She took a safe gamble and called her girlfriend.

 

Mabel picked up on the first ring. Pacifica was momentarily surprised before she remembered they had been having a deep debate over what Waddles and Gompers would name their pig-goat hybrid children (hypothetically speaking but this was Gravity Falls) when her parents had needed to _discuss_ something with her.

 

“PACIFICAAAAA!!! How ARE you this beautiful evening? Are you trying to sneak me away on a secret romantic rendezvous?” Mabel giggled. She was probably laying in a warm bed, her legs stretched up a wall, Waddles at her side, Dipper on the other side of the room reading a book.

 

Mabel sounded so happy. Pacifica wanted to pretend that she was back in her room and happy and to not ruin Mabel’s joy, but her tongue was suddenly too big for her mouth and she had to swallow rapidly six times in a row to keep from coughing and she couldn’t _breathe_ —

 

“Paz? Hey, what’s wrong?” Mabel was probably sitting up in bed now, checking the clock, Dipper looking at her in concern maybe. Pacifica wanted to be wherever Mabel was. She didn’t care if it was the mansion. She needed someone who was glad she existed.

 

“I—” Pacifica sobbed as she sat on the curb, phone pressed tightly to her ear. “My, um, my mom and dad...they, um, like, I guess? Looked through my phone? They—They—They, um, found out that we are..that we are dating and they—Mom—my mom—mostly my mom—she’s really pissed and angry and I’m an embarrassment and I need to start liking boys and and stop acting like a, like—a whore and my face hurts and I just can’t _do_ this, Mabel, I can’t—I can’t— _I hate them so much_ , Mabel! Why can’t I just be allowed to love you, it’s not fair—” Pacifica took multiple quick, shallow breaths, trying to collect her thoughts, trying to stop crying, trying to curl into a ball and disappear.

 

On the other end, Pacifica heard Mabel breathing slow, calm and secret-but-not-a-secret-to-her terrified breaths. “Pacifica, sweetie, where are you? Are you still in your house?” Mabel’s question was laced with worry. Something that almost never came from her parents. If they ever felt worry, it was for their reputation, their family name, their wealth, not their daughter.

 

“No,” Pacifica managed to say. “No, I—I snuck out again. I’m sitting at the corner of Chambrot and Worrel.”

 

“Of course, of course.” Mabel sounded pained, Pacifica noticed. She was probably trying to get out of her bed sheets. Pacifica heard her girlfriend yell to her twin, “Dipper, go get Grunkle Stan right now! GRUNKLE STAN!” Pacifica imagined Mabel racing down a maze of hallways that she herself barely mastered to get to find her three Grunkles. “GRUNKLE STAN! GRUNKLE FIDDLEFORD! WAKE UP! IT’S—” Mabel’s voice got distorted slightly and some words were hard to make out, other voices coming through the device. Pacifica could only assume the brunette was talking with her hands

 

Pacifica wiped at her eyes, and took deep breaths.

 

After a minute and a half Mabel addressed her again. “Pacifica, sorry. Are you still there? Pacifica?”

 

She laughed dryly. “I’m here.”

 

“Okay, great! Sorry. Um. Okay, so Soos is going to pick you up and bring you to the mansion. Since he’s a closer distance to you. Grunkle Stan is calling him now.”

 

“Okay.” Soos was a cool guy. Simple, but loyal, kind. Pacifica had grown fond of him, as she did everyone Mabel and Dipper cared about, it seemed.

 

“Yeah. I’m gonna stay on the line until he gets there, okay? So, stay where you are.”

 

“Okay. Thank you, Mabel. I’m sorry for troubling you.” Sometimes Pacifica was surprised how quickly those words had been able to enter her vocabulary since meeting Mabel, but she didn’t think about that then.

 

“It’s no trouble!” Mabel promised. “Thank you so much for calling me! I’m glad you’re—relatively okay? You said your mom hit you?”

 

As Pacifica made a noise of confirmation, she could clearly hear Stanley bellow an angry curse as if Mabel was on speaker phone. That made Pacifica actually laugh.

 

“I love you, Mabel.”

 

“I love you, too!” Pacifica knew she meant it.

 

Suddenly twin car lights shined in Pacifica’s peripherals, prompting the girl to stand. “Soos is here,” she told Mabel, “I’m gonna hang up, I think.”

 

“Okay! Great! I’ll see you in a few minutes!”

 

“Bye, Mabes,” Pacifica whispered as she opened the passenger door to Soos’s pickup truck and sat down.

 

“See you in a bit, Paz. I love you! Muwah!” The blonde smiled and kissed her phone silently. The call ended.

 

Soos was all encouraging smiles and high fives and eyes that told her he understood her pain. He let her pick the music and told her all about this time he and Dipper uncovered a magical mailbox in the woods.

  
Pacifica closed her eyes and smiled thinly, grateful for the distraction.


End file.
